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Category Archives: LGB&
So many people so little time. Clubs, pubs, social networks, facebook, bebo, twitter, for some pale in comparison to the meet ‘n’ greet via their smart phone. They can delve into the fine minutiae of peoples lives, then move on. More communicate with their one for now. While others meet the one.
Yes indeed There’s an app for that!
The list below ins not comprehensive for some apps are fleeting while others go on & on.
Kevin speaks on being a gay parent. Starting the group LGBT Parents Southeast. Its impact on the lifes of his children and the groups continued growth one year on. ‘Getting better and better all the time’ Kevin made this video … Continue reading
Mr Gay Ireland 2010/ 11
Name: Barry Francis Gouldsbury
Height: 185 cm
Occupation: I am a hairdresser. I have worked in Loreal as an educater, I am also studying fitness to become a personal trainer.
Hobbies: I am currently Irish champion in acrobatics gymnastics.
October 2011 I spoke to Baz Gouldsbury Mr Gay Ireland 2010/ 11 about his Mr Gay Ireland experiences and journey to Mr Gay World.
Q: When I’ve spoken to people I’ve explained that there is more to Mr Gay Ireland than a beauty pageant. There is Fundraising for the HIV clinic in St James Hospital Dublin. LGBT awareness raising and being positive role models for young Irish LGBT. Receive visits and speak to practitioners and people from HIV clinics. Be ambassadors for Ireland and the Irish gay community.
When you first heard of Mr Gay Ireland were you aware of any of this?
Baz: No, I had a reason for going forward. When I lived in the UK a friend of mine was diagnosed with HIV. We didn’t know anything about it. We were so distraught. It was all unhappiness that he was going to die. We weren’t educated at all. We knew nothing about the medication or long term. When he was rediagnosed two years later, we had learnt so much in two years.
About the medication and how people live so much longer into their late 60′s and 70′s. People can have children. People can have their sperm washed. Also people can have * PeP which is when someone thinks they might have come in contact with HIV, it’s kind of like a morning after pill. It was such a tramatic time.
Then I heard of a Mr Gay Ireland who had a lot to do with the HIV cause. That’s probably what motivated me mostly about going into the Mr Gay Ireland. Because a lot of people still don’t know a lot about HIV and the people that do know recognise it’s not a death sentence, so they don’t mind having unprotected sex. They can be treated for it. Which is a shame, because, it is still an epidemic. At the moment it’s as bad as it was in the 80′s. In the eighties they had no medication.
That was my motivation for going forward for Mr Gay Ireland.
Why do you think that in the media HIV is not considered as serious as it was in the 80′s. Is it because there is an effective treatment?
Baz: Yes it is because there is treatment. I have seen the adverts from the eighties. Where they were shock adverts. I wasn’t born then. Definatly people are not worried when I speak to my fans they tell me, it’s not a death sentance, it’s just like having diabetes. HIV is not seen as a serious death sentence.
My friends were so positive, it was brilliant. You see so many people who aren’t coping with it. I can understand people not coping with HIV and stuff , thinking the world has ended. Then there loads of people on the other side who think I’m not gonna die.
The general public know particularly young gay people know it’s not a death sentance. When I lived in the UK people people kind of purposely, just unself consciously aware say. Oh well if I have unprotected sex it’s not the end of the world. Which is stupid really.
Q: More on the nitty gritty there was a nice article in the Wexford People Paper this week about Valerie and mentioned that. You came tenth in the Mr Gay World.
What was required of contestants for the various heats?
Baz: For the Mr Gay Ireland ?
Mr Gay Ireland is very similar to Mr Gay World. Basically there was a panel interview, then there were clubwear, formal wear then we had to speak for a minute. Speak about a topic that was close to our heart. I spoke obviously about my friend with HIV. Mr World is a similar format except you don’t speak on the stage and there is a talent round as well.
Though most people think oh I couldn’t stand up there and take my clothes off but it’s not like that at all. I said it before and I’ll say it again you can’t lie about yourself. If you’re true to yourself it will come across, be genuine. If you have a valid reason it will show. Just keep true to yourself and you’ll do well in Mr Gay Ireland, Mr Gay World.
You’ve mentioned some harrowing but eyeopening experiences you’ve had along the way to Mr World.
Baz: it’s been such an emotional and self building experience. Experiences I’d never have had in my life. When I was out at Mr World we visited an orphanage. We brought books, crayons and copies stuff like that that they don’t have. We were in a building well there wasn’t really a building you know how that goes in third world countries. We decorated it from floors upwards to the roof we put in book shelves. Then we were allowed to go out with the children while they were having spaghetti bolognese ’n’ stuff.
They were so happy.
* PEP is not a “morning-after pill.” It is a program of several drugs, several times each day, for at least 30 days. Two antiretroviral drugs—the same kind that HIV-positive patients have taken since the ’80s. As preventative medicine, the drugs work with a one-two punch: The first intercepts the virus’ initial attachment to DNA, and the second stops infected cells from spreading the virus. The virus must be intercepted before it attaches to cells and reaches the lymph nodes, it is crucial that PEP be administered immediately—each passing hour means decreased effectiveness. more
There are many options out there and potentially complications if you don’t think about safety before meeting someone in person for the first time.
- Get To Know Him First
Ask as many detailed questions as possible before committing to meet. Sometimes the person on the other end of the computer may not be who they say they are. Watch for inconsistencies or strange behaviors. If you see any warning signs or just have a bad feeling about the situation, trust your instincts and stop chatting.
- Protect Your Identity and Personal Information
Never disclose personal information with a stranger online. It’s not necessary to use a fake name, but be weary of giving out your address, place of work, or any other sensitive information.
- Leave a Trail
Stay on the side of caution by leaving a note at home detailing where you’re traveling or text a good friend and let them know your exact location and how the date is going. This may seem like overkill, but your safety is well worth a few seconds of time and effort.
- Get A Photo
No photo, no date. That’s a good rule to live by in online dating. Ask him to email pictures other than the ones in his profile. Get as many details about the picture as possible, including the dates they was taken. Save the picture in an accessible folder on your computer.
- Listen For Details
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they communicate. Does something about the conversation make you uncomfortable? Do you have a bad feeling? Before meeting in person, listen carefully during video chat sessions and phone conversation.
- Meet In A Public Place
Meet in a relaxed, but public place with as many people around as possible. Try a busy restaurant or cafe. Avoid meeting at his home or in dark, hidden places.
- Map An Exit
Know where your exits are and the most effective way to use them should you feel uncomfortable. As an extra precaution, visit the place you’re supposed to meet before the date. After the date, take a route other than your normal path home just in case he follows you without your consent.
- Know His Sexual History
The best way to protect your body (remember HIV and Syphilis are still alive and well) is to know the status of your sexual partner. Not everyone tells the truth about their HIV status. Warning signs are refusal to answer questions about their status, ambiguity about the date of their last STD tests, ambiguity about the number of partners they’ve been with, and willingness to have sex without a condom among others. Asking if he’s “clean” is not enough. Protect yourself by assuming your partner is positive until proven otherwise.